Has your friend list suddenly been reduced lately? You may be losing friends without even realizing why. Here are some common reasons you could be losing friends, and what you can do to combat them.
1. Too Busy
Being busy is something a lot of us deal with, but if you are consistently putting other obligations in your life ahead of your friends, they may feel you don't care and back away from your life. If you have been running at a fast pace for a while, you might not even realize you are losing friends.
- What to do: Get in touch! Be proactive when it comes to your friends so they don't feel they need to hound you just to get a hello. Some ways to keep friendships going include sending a quick email, writing a note, and calling friends up to schedule lunch.
Email is a great communication tool, but it can also cause misunderstandings if it is not used correctly. If you're using email to vent your frustrations to a friend, you might start an email fight without realizing it. This occurs when something you've said over email gets misconstrued and instead of understanding your side of things, your friend gets mad.
- What to do: Watch what you say and how you say it when using email. If you sent a questionable email and then never heard back from your friend, follow up with a phone call and see if you can connect face-to-face.
Saying you're sorry for the things you do wrong is key to having a long-lasting friendship. If you make a mistake, don't pretend it didn't happen. Apologizes don't have to be dramatic in order to be effective, but they do need to be timely and sincere.
- What to do: If you've got an apology to give, don't put it off. Figure out what type of apology is right and follow through with it.
4. Too Clingy
Do you demand too much from your friends? If it seems like your pals can't schedule time for you, maybe you require more attention than they are able to give.
- What to do: There are plenty of reasons for clinginess, but one way to combat this is to meet new people. A steady stream of potential friends coming in your life will help you give the proper attention to each of your relationships.
Friends need our support during the great and lousy moments in life, so if you've been remiss in "being there," it's time to make up for it. First, ask your friend if everything is okay between you two. If your friend hesitates (or gives you a flat out "no") offer to take them to lunch to hash it out.
- What to do: Apologize for your tardiness in coming to their side, and allow your friend to tell you about their latest issue or achievement. Lending an ear in this type of situation goes a long way to making up for your lack of attention. Next time your friend needs you, be there without question.